Focus on that Crazy Love!

When I was getting my doctorate, one of the first classes that I took had each of us decide on a word or mission statement to get us effectively through the process of school. It was a practice that I thought was silly at first, but it has definitely helped me even after I finished school.

What's the love of your life? Where is your focus? I've decided that's my WORD for 2010 is FOCUS. I am an expert on NOT focusing! Let me just take you into a moment of my brain and my world...I start folding clothes. Then, I think, "ooooh, I need to put out meat to thaw out for dinner." Oh, yeah, while I am getting the meat out of the freezer, I think of this wonderful magazine article that describes ways to organize your freezer. I start moving things around in my freezer and make a list of what I need to buy and find for this project. Oh, no, there was a scream...two little girls are wrestling on the floor for a naked baby doll. I become referee for the moment. Suddenly, I realize that I had left my dryer open and the clothes halfway folded. Some little person has placed handfuls of crayons in the dryer as well, which I notice several hours later that I somehow missed one. Was that the phone ringing or the doorbell? Oh well, back to my chaos. Now, I have towels and a sheet with blue wax melted forever on them. This is the way my days go as a mama. I am a professional, self-proclaimed sidetracked mama or a mama with ADHD. My brain runs so quickly of what to do and what needs to be done. I have so many creative things I want to get accomplished, and I have two little cuties that need full attention. So, my word for the year, my focus, and my mission is FOCUS. Focus on what needs to be accomplished (timers and lists really help me), and FOCUS on what is important! I am working on it diligently, but I am continually reminding myself not to forget!

Our Sunday School group is doing a book study on a book called Crazy Love. (12 dollars at Walmart!) It has just reminded me over and over to FOCUS! It has taken me out of my 360 view, which is quite limited and often very selfish. I feel like I am looking at everything from a bird's eye view...when I step back and FOCUS! My husband is even reading the book! He doesn't care to read (I know, isn't that crazy!), but the book is very reader friendly. I  love my crazy life. I love how much I am learning in this season of my life. I feel like my world as a mama is overflowing with blessings. I'm continually intrigued at how hard mamas work to do it all. I'm intrigued and inspired. It's the same crazy love that mamas have for their children that the author of Crazy Love talks about we should have for Jesus.

Check out this video http://www.crazylovebook.com/videos_stop.html. It'll help you FOCUS:).

Hmmm...what to do with your little ones during winter break?

Creating our number "train" game on the floor of the playroom.

 What to do with your little ones while you are hard at work putting away Christmas and trying to get everything back in order after the holiday and guests? Well, when I went in shock because my LaLa came around the corner saying, "Mama, I don't have anything left to do?" Little Bit, of course, was right on her heels sharing her bored sentiment. All of these wonderful toys that Santa left...and nothing to do? Is that possible? I think the true problem was..."okay, mommy...we've played by ourselves while you did your 'to do's' and we need some mama attention now...right now!"

LaLa so proud of her number game!

So, I  bargained for a few more minutes to finish my task. Then, we began working with numbers. Little Bit can count to three with help. She knows this means...about to go down the slide or about to do something, but she does not know they are numbers...we're not quite old enough for that yet! We pulled out some fun sheets for LaLa to trace numbers and Little Bit to color...with our new, fun crayola items! Then, we cut them out and played lots of games with them. We mixed them up and put them back in order. We would pull one out of the bag then go off to find that many of an item. For example, when we pulled out 9, LaLa ran to point to apples and oranges in the fruit bowl. Yep, there were 9! It was a fun and learning activity that we just threw together! Lessons learned: Sometimes the best learning activities for your kids will be those spur of the moment...by the seat of your pants...kind of fun! It was a fun alternative to flashcards. It developed one to one correspondence, counting forward, counting backward, writing and recognizing numbers 1-20.

LaLa had to show her daddy the games she named "the number train game". They enjoyed the games all over that evening!

Other fun ideas:

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  Need to organize your pantry? Let your little ones build with your cans or play with your pots. It'll give you some time to get it done!
  
  
  
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  Bundle up and go for a walk! Talk about how things look different in the winter!
  
  
  
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  Make a bird feeder and put bird seed out for those hungry birds toughing out the winter!
  
  
  
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  Make a chalkboard wall for your kids to create their masterpieces!
  
  
  
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  Bake!
  
  
  
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  Bring in a bike or a trike or a cozy coupe...yes, inside the house! Clean it first...esp. the wheels. It will have a great deal of novelty because it's inside!
  
  
  
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  Reinforce pretend play...make a puppet show (even make your own puppets), play store, play trucks or tea party...show your kids how to pretend! Try not to look at the clock and enjoy the pretending yourself!
  
  
  
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  I am going to try this tomorrow...while cleaning the bathroom or a closet (if it has a mirror) let your kids draw on it with dry erase markers.
  
  
  
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  build a town with blocks! give them a building...run off to do a task...run back and praise their efforts just in time to give them a new building idea. In the end, spend a few minutes helping them make signs for their town. Best of both worlds...you get quick tasks accomplished and play with your kids!
  
  
  

Good luck keeping your little ones busy during this school break and in your attempts to start the New Year off organized!

Mama Drama Rule #94: The best activities with your kids will be the ones you create from your heart...not necessarily the ones that take forever...and cost!

A Wiggly Good Time!

We went to the Wiggles concert on Sunday. It was a full day trip because it was over an hour away. I have to be honest and say that the wiggles is definitely one of my favorite concerts. I am actually being serious. They keep my entire family completely entertained! They go out of their way to make sure the children and the families enjoy their time, and they definitely make sure that you get your money worth. This was our third wiggles concert, and I have learned quite a bit along the way! You might think I'm a little quirky for even blogging this, but I have more times than not looked up this very same topic online when I have been planning my family's trips to various concerts!

First, the wiggles is the only concert that I know for kids where the characters come out into the crowd. They also will read your child's sign if you make one and hold it up at the appropriate time. (I actually read this online the first time we went and was so excited to see that it was true!) I learned that my kids were even more excited if I included their names in the sign we all created, then the wiggles would say their names. Wow, this is unbelievable to small children. LaLa continued to say over and over...I can't believe Murray knows my name! They make you bring half size poster board sheets now. We happen to have ours rolled up in the bag, and I didn't hear this rule until later...fortunately for our sign!

Second, bring whatever "character" stuff to eliminate the need to make extra, expensive purchases at the event. Wow, those "souvenirs" are so pricey! I thought about buying a "wags" lovey for my Little Bit, but it was fifteen dollars! The first concert we took LaLa to we were so unprepared! We went empty handed, and we spent a fortune. We have learned...after that experience...to go prepared! We took all of the little stuffed characters with us, the hat, the sword, the light up red car, etc. Just so you know too...they always sell something that is going to light up and just attract your children like moths to a flame! Well, fortunately, we did buy this item three years ago at our first wiggles concert. We just bring it every time we go back. We also keep those bracelets and necklaces that glow on hand. They are at the dollar store for a pack of six or so, and they are marvelous for events like this!

Third, save even more money! Bring snacks and drinks! I always try to pack something fun and different. This time I packed these neat dinosaur fruit snacks where you try to put them together to make a dinosaur! Oh! Something else to bring that is specifically for the Wiggles concert is a bone for wags and roses for dorothy! A lot of times if you get there early, you can also get some cute pictures in front of the stage. We were able to get some really cute pictures before an elmo show of LaLa at "sesame street". Another random and money-saver is to try craig's list or ebay to get tickets. The closer it is to event...the more desperate people are to sell tickets...cheaper! My friend managed to get some great Elmo tickets this way! Wiggles is our tradition. We went ahead and ordered from ticketmaster to ensure that we did get tickets this year. If you sign up for ticketmaster, they will tell you when tickets go on sale. Sometimes, as for the wiggles concert, they will also do a presale to provide you with an opportunity to get even better seats!

Fourth, make it memorable. Work together with your kids to make a special outfit. They can even paint on a shirt or try iron ons! Take pictures. Make a scrapbook together after the event. It makes the memory last, and you will not believe how much your kids will invest into making a scrapbook, talking, and sharing it with anyone who will listen! Create a countdown with sticky notes counting down the days before the special event. This can build the anticipation for anything! Enjoy your kids' expressions throughout the event. The first time Robert and I took LaLa to the Wiggles concert, she was about a year and a half. She literally opened her mouth, eyes staring straight ahead, and clenched both fists shaking her entire body because she was so excited. I just stared at her, and I almost cried myself because of her enjoyment. That is what it's all about!

It's easy to say you don't want to do things (concerts, museums, trips, etc.) because your child is too young to remember them one day or to put things off until they are older. However, most of our personalities are developed by age three...before most of our recalled memory ability is developed. Don't wait until they are older. It is so meaningful to their development at every part of their life! It doesn't have to be expensive or anything huge. It has to be something that builds experiences. Our children personalities, their inquisitive nature, their passions are developed through these experiences that we offer them.

Mama Drama Rule #70: Even if they never remember that we took them to this place or on this trip, we can know that it is all part of what makes them into what they will be one day!

Just admit it...you hear voices in your head too!

Do you have five thousand million zillion (not sure that' even a number!) things running through your head that you would like to do, should do, or need to do? I think it's in a woman's nature to have these things running constantly through our minds. It's even worse for a mama. We walk through our house and trigger after trigger goes off. For me, I walk in a room, and I think I have to clean that, I need to put up the laundry on the chair, I need to change the sheets, I need to update those pictures, did I remember to schedule pictures, what will wear for the pictures....that's just walking to my closet through my bedroom.

Then, I finally get to bedroom, and I begin thinking...what am I going to wear today, is it cold, is it hot, I want to take the kids to the pumpkin patch, they would look cute in little orange monogrammed dresses, I should make those, what would they wear under it, what does LaLa need for her fall party, I need to keep working with her on writing her letters, what letter are they on this week, this pair of pants don't fit, (I'm still in my closet trying to find something to wear), I need to go through my clothes and purge, should I give away my variety of sizes (I have everything from 2 to 12 as I go back and forth between pregnant Tammy and regular Tammy), should I just keep them, should we have more kids, I'm too tired to have more kids, I need to go shopping and get some fall clothes, oh, yeah, the girls still need some dresses for cooler weather...oh, I hear someone up...what should they wear? Yeah, by this point, all this has gone through my head and I'm still not dressed.

That is what's wrong with all of us. That is why we can multi-task better than men. If a man had these same thoughts running through their heads, they would curl up in a fetal position and cry. In fact, in some ways...they do this already. It's the times that they call us or insinuate that we are nagging...we're just giving them a small impression of what we hear constantly. They can't handle it so we must go through this world on our own with our thoughts running in circles!

How do we manage this chaos in our heads? Well, for me, I don't think I have an off switch. I just eventually collapse and sleep so hard that I can't hear the thoughts! A better alternative is to make a list and prioritize. What is it you HAVE to do? What is it you WANT to do? What is it you SHOULD be doing? Then, make goals and deadlines for each ones...go ahead and make them cushy deadlines. Publish and Post them so everyone knows what you are working toward! It makes you accountable if you publish and post them in your house! Plus, when you divide all these thoughts into these three columns, it makes you realize what really has to be done. If we let the thoughts continuously circle in our heads, we rarely get anything done and still find ourselves completely exhausted and frustrated at the end of the day!

My list changes constantly because what was a priority last week may change. Do I have to clean out my closet? No, I can live with it...despite my husband's complaints. Should I clean it out? Yes, it would probably save me time and sanity in the long run. So, I'll set a goal and a deadline to get it done! Even if you don't plan on using your prioritized list, it's a great form of release. It's like taking charge of all those thoughts in your head that you just can't ever master! Keep working at it...and accept that it's part of being a woman...and becomes even worse as a mama...then, you have your own thoughts, as well as the thoughts of your kids' well being and needs running through your brain!

Mama Drama Rule #53: All those thoughts that run through our head constantly telling us everything we should be doing, need to be doing, and really want to do in our lives is often like clutter in our homes. It can take over and take control of us. It can squelch our spirits and our joy. So, take charge...or as a last resort...just admit you hear voices in your head and maybe somebody can help out! I haven't tried that one yet, but I haven't ruled it out...

I'm a Coupon Class Graduate

Well, it finally happen. I met and learned from the "coupon lady". It was a wet, rainy day down here, yet I was so giddy. You know how you get this image in your head of someone...but you've never ever met them before? Well, that is the way it was. I can assure you that she did not disappoint me! I walked in, and I wanted to shake her hand and say, "Wow, so nice to meet you...a legend!"

It's funny how many people around here seriously know her as the coupon lady. I spent several hours at her house on Saturday with several of my wonderful, money-saving friends and some new friends that I had the opportunity to get to know. The coupon lady is an animated red head with a full personality and love for life. She opened up her home...her food (she is also a chef...yummy) and her wonderful world of coupons to us. I left there with a large goody bag of items that she had collected at Publix...and let me emphasize even got overage on the items(paid back for buying!). She sent us home with handfuls of inserts and coupons, a wonderful notebook of store policies and extra information, the lingo of the coupon world, and so much more that my brain still hasn't even processed!

I came home...quite excited and quite exhausted. Finally, I put the children to bed and my hubby went to my brother's house to watch some football, and I was left to explore the world of couponing! I spent hours on the computer and going through my class information. So, the next day, I was ready to really, really try it out. First, we went to church. Now, everyone knows you are hungry when you leave church...and I didn't factor this in. Next, let me explain that I did have my husband and two little girls...at lunch time...at the grocery store. Needless to say, I didn't do as well as I hoped to, but I did pretty good. I spent 42ish dollars & saved 58 dollars, according to the receipt. Just some of the stuff that I purchased was a couple bags of charcoal, 12 dollars of pork (I did get this free), 2 bbq sauces (free), 2 boxes of wheat thins, 2 boxes of granola bars, 2 glass cleaners, 2 johnson soaps, bread, bananas, boars head turkey, 2.5 lb. turkey, organic milk, 2 newspapers, head of lettuce, betty crocker fruit snacks, etc.

Now, I know most people would be so pumped with my savings, but you haven't met the coupon lady. I just wish someone in the world would post...use this coupon and buy this item...you mine as well buy lots because it's a great price or better yet, it's free. I so want to master the free stuff. I also want someone to lay out...step one do this...step two do this...when you are making a list and couponing. I know it can be done thanks to my couponing friends! I have had several of my friends that went to the class call me in the last two days so excited about their savings! I'm so pumped and proud of them! Keep it up and we'll share the goodies that we find!

The coupon lady is amazing. She gave us the tools and the foundation. Then, she sent us to build the rest. She was so generous with her knowledge and her stuff! She showed me so many possibilities...that I think I have to be disappointed with anything not up to her level! I'm working toward it though! I've realized that it does take time, but saving money is definitely worth investing some time.

I'm just trying to remember...you've got to crawl before you walk...walk before you run...shouldn't I know this as a mama?!

Mama Drama Rule #42: Anything that is worth doing is going to take time and effort!

The Most Important Way to Spend Your Time

We all want to be organized. We all want to have a clean house. It would even be nice if we had clean clothes...better yet if they would be put away in their proper places. We need gas in our cars and groceries in our fridge. We have appointments and work. We have responsibilities and obligations. The list goes on...

Although that all has to be done day in and day out, more importantly, we have moments with our children. We have an opportunity to sit and play. We can listen to that silly joke or crazy story. We can create a neat project. We can build a fort. We can take a chance to teach something new or to share a memory. We can give a great big grizzly hug. We can give silly kisses. We can laugh and giggle.

Mamas have a to do list that would make most people's heads spin, but sometimes, we just have to stop...and tear up the list...and focus on what's important! AND only a mama knows just how important it is! Your list will still be there tomorrow. So, it's okay, if you have to eat out tonight or your house is a mess today, if you gave the time to your child. In the long run, they will remember what you did together...if you stopped to give them attention or a hug or say "I love you"...not if your house was immaculate and you served healthy dinners every night!

Mama Drama Rule #39: Play...genuinely and completely and wholeheartedly...with your children.

My Newest Project: Clearing out the Clutter!

I told LaLa that we were going to go through the room and get rid of the clutter! Now, she, not knowing what clutter even is, said, "okay, close your eyes, mama!" then she exclaimed, "POCA, POCA, clutter go away!" (Poca is her way of saying hocus pocus!) Oh, wow! If it only worked that easily, I would be wondering room to room yelling POCA POCA all day long!


How does a mama get rid of clutter? I look around my house and don’t even know where to start! Well, at least the clutter hides the mess. I consider clutter as anything not in a 'designated' place/home and anything that is not needed or used! For some reason over the last couple weeks, I have become obsessed with clearing out the clutter and getting organized, but as you start clearing out the clutter, you notice the mess. And with a mess...comes me depressed...so here I am wanting to be so organized and clutter free...in a mess, depressed, and obsessed! What a combination! Have you ever been there before?



As you know, I have to research everything when I start something, and of course, I probably could have thoroughly accomplished my task in the same time that I spent researching! I think all mamas have the same problem. We start a task…when we finally decide where we should actually start…then we get interrupted by the chaos that is our life…and our little distractions that we call children! Then, it really happened! I realized that my children are becoming as confined by the clutter in our house as I am! My little attempts at staying organized cannot be accomplished without getting rid of the clutter too!

So, on this little journey, I have discovered something really neat that I want to share! My hubby looked at me really funny when I first explained this concept a couple weeks ago, but slowly he has noticed that it is actually making a difference in our little world and in our little family. As I saw him “shining the sink” this morning, I realized that he has jumped on the bandwagon too. I am still a novice at the entire concept, and I continually find new things when I visit this particular site…when there is actually time. However, as I read throughout the various concepts, I felt like the author was actually talking directly to me! My perfectionism often restricts my abilities to keep a home like I really want. You know where you go to bed thinking, “Well, I didn’t get this and this done, but I’ll just try to do better tomorrow. I felt (and still feel…but at least going in the right direction now!) that I was so overwhelmed with so many things that I WANTED to do and with the mama that I WANTED to be that I couldn’t even get to that point! Through quite a deal of research, I came across the site, http://www.flylady.net/.

I encourage you to check it out. I wish someone would have told me about these concepts years ago when I ‘retired’ from teaching and had to give up our wonderful cleaning lady! It holds you accountable, provides a guide, and it’s perfect for the perfectionist in all of us. I feel like it’s giving me focus on getting done what I want to get done! At times and especially when this mama’s drama takes over, it makes me feel overwhelmed all over again, and I have to remember that I can’t make any progress that way…and I’m not following the “flylady’s advice” on taking “babysteps”…then, I refocus and start over! Let me know what you think! I’m about to make the notebook portion that she talks about. I’ll keep you posted on my progress, but let me just tell you…just this week, I cleaned the top off my refrigerator (seriously!), received a compliment from a visiting friend about my sink (She wanted to know if I got a new sink when I got my cabinets painted a few weeks ago! It’s not…it’s just clean! It was like God jumped down and patted me on the back!), and cleaned my entire laundry room, painted it a happy color, and it’s now one of my favorite rooms(maybe it will inspire me to do better with keeping up with laundry...I obviously haven't gotten to that portion of her lessons yet)!



*Flylady & all of her concepts mentioned above are Copyright 2001 - 2009 FlyLady and Company, Inc. www.flylady.net

Mama Drama Rule #37: In anything in life…Getting started is half of the battle!



Coupon Update: I was told that there is double inserts in the paper today...great for collecting coupons. There is also one opening left in the coupon class we are going to in McDonough, Ga next week, if you are interested! I can't wait to share with you all the wonderful things that we learn! I get giddy when I get to go to "school"...of any kind! I know I'm a nerd!:)

Where is my peace?

I have talked to friend and family today...one after another...who is just struggling so much. My heart and love goes out to them! There is so many unanswered questions and concerns in this crazy world of ours! It may be struggles in our families or financial problems or health issues or just daily drudge that makes our hearts feel heavy and our minds overwhelmed. We cannot control everything. We try so hard, yet time after time things happen that reminds us that we can't control this crazy world. The harder we try...the more frustrated we get. I hope these verses & quotes encourage you...whatever you are going through...and whenever you go through it! Grab onto encouragement in anywhere you can. Hold a friend. Listen to a child laugh. Take a bubble bath! My grandmother used to always say...this too shall pass!

Phil. 4:7
Then God's peace, which goes beyond anything we can imagine, will guard your thoughts and emotions through Christ Jesus.

Colossians 3:15
Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body; and be thankful.

John 14:27
"Peace I leave with you; My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Do not let your heart be troubled, nor let it be fearful.

Helen Keller
Unless we form the habit of going to the Bible in bright moments as well as in trouble, we cannot fully respond to its consolations because we lack equilibrium between light and darkness.

Mama Drama Rule #33: Although the skies may look cloudy, a sunny day is just around the next corner!