A Trip to the Dentist

Oh, wow, I was intimidated by the thought of taking my active three year old to the dentist, but I actually had no idea how to prepare. I read her books on the dentist. We practiced 'playing' dentist. We looked on the Internet at 'dentist tools'. Anything, I could think of...we probably did it. Well, I got there and the waiting room was packed. They had a television playing a movie way over a 3 year old's interest. And, their first cardinal sin...no toys, no books...nothing to amuse the multitude of children waiting nervously. Okay, well, it is part my fault. I should have brought same 'busy' toys, but I didn't. We filled out a multitude of paperwork. We played I Spy with the colorful murals on the wall. My three year old pointed out random facts about the people around us...which really scares a mama what she is going to say in her simple honest comments!

Finally, they called us back. It took serious coercing to get her in the seat...for a full two seconds. Then, I sat with her in this NOT adult sized dentist chair with her in my lap. They did an x-ray of her teeth. Then, the assistant left the room and us in the room for about fifteen LONG minutes while my three year old is getting more and more nervous. The assistant's last words to my daughter was..."oh, you'll love the dentist. She'll give you a special little ducky and a toothbrush when you leave." This helped a little bit. She actually begins to sit in the chair alone and asking questions about the items around the room. Honestly, if I didn't know what it was, I just made it up!

Finally, a young woman came in and asked if I had any concerns. I didn't realize this at first, but she was the dentist. Once I realized it, I asked her name and introduced her to LaLa. Now, I believe professionally, especially working with children, you should come in, introduce yourself, and speak to the child. So, strike one for you Miss Dentist.

She ended up being very nice...even with the strike against her. As I have to sit back down in that tiny chair with my daughter in my lap, she tells LaLa that she is going to turn her bright sunshine on so she can see all her pretty teeth. Hehehe...you don't know my daughter! She looked up at me, and she said, "mama, what did she say?"I repeat what the dentist said, and my daughter looks up again and says, "Is she kiddin'? That's just a bright light." I explained that she was pretending so it would be more fun. Miss Dentist just smiled and sighed. I'm sure she was counting down until her day would be done.

During the teeth inspection, LaLa mentioned that special duck again. She mentioned something about it being a cheerleader. This should have been my first clue that everything was about to go down hill fast! Miss Dentist compliments LaLa's beautiful teeth, and she gives her a princess rubber ducky, a toothbrush, and floss. In a flash, my child goes from being completely shy, nervous and normal to something that looks like I imagine the Biblical examples of a demon possessed person thrashing around on the ground and speaking in some frantic, crazy cries.

Then, I saw it. On the top of the towel dispenser in the room was a little cheerleader rubber ducky...not a princess one. From the very beginning of the appointment, LaLa was trying her best to control herself from this random person with items in her mouth to earn this ducky that the assistant had mentioned. Since she had seen that particular cheerleader ducky, she decided that was what her heart desired. Upon my brain comprehending what was happening and also trying to control the wailing child on the ground, I tried to explain to Miss Dentist. She looked confused, which is understandable with the need for an exorcist at this point. She said, "I'll just give the ducky to mommy in case you change her mind." Strike 2 for Miss Dentist.

We make an attempt to leave, which is really me just holding her as she twists and contorts her body telling me about this cheerleader ducky they said she could have. I make one last attempt and ask the lady up front for a cheerleader ducky in trade for the princess one. She gave me this look...like, Lady, you are the worse mom ever rewarding your fit throwin' child with a different duck. My response back (in my mind only, of course) was a quick kick in her big behind and yelling at her that it was her dumb assistant that mentioned this duck...this duck that my child saw and had genuinely thought was hers for suffering through this event. She wasn't helpful, which made LaLa meltdown even more. I have never seen her meltdown to quite that degree. It was like all the nervousness, anxiety, and frustration bubbled to the surface making her incapable to talk and walk and appear normal. We sat in the car almost thirty minutes until she finally calmed down to hiccups and a red, tear stained face.

Now, here I am working for weeks to completely prepare her for the dentist. What I didn't prepare for was this stupid little duck! It took me by complete surprise. Despite the meltdown about this little cheerleader duck, LaLa did well for the actual "dentist" part of the event. We may not be allowed back in that particular office...just kidding, I hope, but she really just acted the way I feel when I go to the dentist...heck, and when I feel like I've been "duped"!


Mama Drama Rule #2: As prepared as you think you might be, it's NEVER prepared enough! Kids have a way of showing you that! Just remember that being prepared is not the key in raising children, it's focusing on what went RIGHT and SURVIVAL!