This Season of Our Life

Everything has seasons. Even the Bible reiterates that in Ecclesiastes. Ecclesiastes 3 says, “For everything there is a season…”

I never thought about our own lives having seasons. I have a friend that always compares what ministries she is involved in with what season she is in life. The older I get, I realize exactly how much this is true in my life. These seasons evolve as where we are in life change—getting married, being pregnant, having babies, working, not working, having teenagers, retiring, etc. Our children even go through these “seasons” in life. We often call them “phases”. As these seasons change, our relationships with our children change. I have a completely different relationship with my mother since I have had children. It is now more of a mentor relationship just as much as it’s a mother/daughter relationship. Has our love changed? No, our relationship has just changed as our seasons—where we are in life—has changed.

All relationships must evolve and grow as you go through different seasons in life. Marriages and friendships must change with what season you are in life too. In part, I believe this is why the divorce rate is so high. In addition, this is why friendships grow closer and farther apart. Partners refuse to evolve with the seasonal changes. It takes work, understanding, and acceptance. If you left your yard untouched for an entire year, what would happen? It wouldn’t be pretty, would it? Regular upkeep and maintenance during seasonal changes is what keeps the yard looking nice. Relationships are the same way.

I had this conversation recently with a friend of mine. When you have children, one of your biggest fears is that you’ll lose your single friends or friends that don’t have children. You don’t lose these friends, but you can’t maintain the same relationship you had BC (before children). You are on a new timetable with new priorities. The problems arise when you try to resist the season of your life changing.

“The most beautiful discovery true friends make is that they can grow separately without growing apart”—Elisabeth Foley. Relationships change as we change. We must accept that and embrace it in order to get more out of them. For example, I can’t expect my husband to be the same person he was when we dated. We are closer and stronger, now, because we have both changed as our seasons in life have changed. Relationship should lift you up…not bring you down. It should bring acceptance and compliment who you are. No one other than God should complete you or fulfill you. Samuel Johnson said, “If a man does not make new acquaintances as he advances through life, he will soon find himself left alone; one should keep his friendships in constant repair.”

Mama Drama Rule #3: Treasure the season of life that you are in right now. It will change, and you will change with it. Know your season so you can enjoy it to the fullest. Know your season so you aren’t trying to get tulips to bloom in the middle of the winter! If it is being a wife and mother, cultivate that season!