A Mama's Trauma: Am I Being Punked??

I have got to tell you about my experience Friday. I thought I would use Friday to get some things done at our house...you know when the cable guy or the bug man or whoever gives you this random, ridiculous range of time that they plan to maybe come to your house and provide their service. Well, that was my day. I took a day, after I picked LaLa up from Preschool, and made my entire afternoon and evening available to these appointments. Well, the last one left was the bug people to do our monthly service. We've had a lot of rain in Georgia lately, and from what I understand that is why I keep seeing sporadic little ants on my kitchen tile. Hmm...don't care why...just don't want them here!

So, I have an appointment from 2-4. No problem, right? Well, you would think. A friend of mine has an emergency of sorts. And, because I worry about her (she tries to take on the world...all the time) & because she has that super mama syndrome (where she never lets friends help her...hope she's reading this!) and begged her to let me watch her two little girls while she had to run to the doctor. Her girls are both my girls ages so it's perfect playmates. We did puppet shows & played outside...crazy with two one year olds and two three year olds, but it was a lot of fun.

Well, the wonderful bug..let's say technician...had not arrived by four so I called the office. After being transferred twice, they contacted the tech to say they were running an hour late. Well, great, thanks for letting me know! So, we wait. An hour and a half late there is a knock on my door. It was an individual that was so tall she literally seemed to duck walking into my doorway...she wore a uniform bearing the companies name....long braided hair...had a deep voice...seemed kinda stocky, etc. I didn't think twice about it. She asked me what was the problem...I said, "Well, it's our regular monthly service they do, but I have seen a few little black ants on my tile in the last couple weeks and they won't go away." She asked probably a dozen ridiculous questions. Then, she asked, "Are all of these (referring to the children playing behind me) yours?" I explained that two were and two were a friends that had an emergency. She said, "they are just everywhere...talking about the kids." Let me point out that she still hadn't entered the house.

I won't go into the whole ordeal, but she basically told me that she couldn't spray inside because of the kids and couldn't spray outside because they would get chemically burned potentially for the next three weeks. Now, I have had this service for three years so I was concerned she was full of it or they had been doing this at the risk of my family. She asked us to leave...so we left to play outside...again...while she sprayed three rooms...maybe four of my house. Then, she went outside and we came inside. Four different times, she asked me to come outside to discuss bugs. Seriously, one time there was a dead beetle of some kind on the edge of my driveway. She came in, requested I come outside because she had something to discuss. I've never discussed so much with any bug tech ever! I grab one baby on each hip with two concerned preschoolers behind me and follow this person outside to see a cluster of ants on this beetle....seriously!

One time, she had me come outside and see that there were ants near my trashcan that we roll down the driveway. Hmm...imagine that. My husband drove up about then, and she had him move it. He moved it a few yards away looking confused at the chaos he drove up into. She said speaking to me, "See mam, this is why I think you need to have more ant knowledge if you have an ant problem. Sir, (to my husband) move it farther from your home." I told her I have a doctorate degree and ant knowledge was obviously left out of it...but if I had ant knowledge then I wouldn't need her! In response to her comment, my husband looked at me and moved the trash can another few yards away INTO the lot next door where they are building a house...I don't think they're going to go for that either. Our trashcan has been there for six years, and it's never been a problem. Probably because we pay her company to spray monthly!

She wanted to know why I had fences in my house...referring to the child gate at the bottom and the top of my stairs. She said she's never been in a house with fence. Odd person. The list of odd things, which I won't bore you with, continue until the grand finale!

Since we are trying to avoid being in the house...you know because she scared us to death of being in our house after she sprayed for our ants (seriously, I have seen maybe 10-20 in three weeks). We decided to take the kids...all four...for a walk. I didn't want to leave this odd person alone in my house so I asked if she was finished (as she was putting her equipment away)....I asked if she sprayed the exterior of the house...she said she wouldn't because I have kids! (They have every month for three years...never telling me it's dangerous...by the way, I called and it's not.)

Let me emphasize that four little ones are vying for my attention during all of this. I had already discussed with the tech that our former tech that consistently came out, Kevin, never mentioned these concerns, which made me concerned on what was reality. I look at my husband and say, "Kevin never told me any of this. I can't imagine that it's dangerous or why in the world would they have been doing this service for the last few years."

I continued to say to my husband, "Did he ever mention it to you." The tech turns around and says... I kid you not..."I don't appreciate being called a HE. I'm a transgender, and I've worked very hard to overcome being a HE to be a SHE." WHAT?! Let me repeat...WHAT?! I said, "excuse me?! I don't care if you are a he or a she. I care about the safety of my family and the service that you are here to provide. Your gender is your business, but I was referring to our former tech, Kevin, who was a HE. You are mistaken and you are obviously insecure with whatever you are or were. I'll have someone else come and finish my services." Then, when she/he left...I had to ask my husband what in the world a transgender was. Wow, was I shocked. At first, I thought it was a man dressing up as a girl...just a guess...I don't know!?! Yes, I'm sheltered.

Now, I have a different person coming out next week to do my exterior...at this point...what's the point?! I contacted someone...in California...who laughed hard at the story. I am not at the point of laughing at the situation quite yet! I'm sure I'll get there. I also have supervisor names and corporates phone number...and now, additional stuff to do on my Monday list. Hopefully, at least my friends can get a laugh from my mama trauma! Frustrating to say the least, a learning experience...maybe...made a Friday evening interesting....absolutely!

Mama Drama Rule #47: Sometimes being sheltered can be a blessing in disguise! Remember that with your kiddos! Filter what the world teaches them...there are times at my age I even wish I had a filter from the world's lessons too!